Is there anything the French does not try to plan? Its oppressive education system aside, and in a clear showing that French politicians need some real crisis to lose sleep over, here’s what’s on the French agenda this week.
The French elite is united in their desire to ban the burka, citing its divine mandate and unique French imperative to free those women from the “prison” those items of clothing create. What’s more ironic than throwing legal tricks around to render a previously harmless act illegal? That less than 0.06% of French’s Muslim population dons the cursed thing!
Women wearing the head-to-toe covering, which leaves just a narrow opening for the eyes, are a rare sight in France. The French domestic intelligence agency said late last year it has even counted them, and found precisely 367 niqab-wearers in a country with a Muslim population estimated at close to six million.
Next, the connoisseur and patron of under-aged sex tourism, French Cultural Minister Frederic Mitterrand, wants to tax Google (perhaps because taxing the Internet is just a tad too, ambitious) for “the development of legal outlets for buying books, movies and especially music on the Internet”. Because the French Internet is particularly averse to file-sharing that’s destroying the great institution known as French innovation.
I have a better idea[:] how about we tax the French Telecom companies for allowing access to the data, then we can tax the PC manufacturers that sell products in France for providing the equipment to users to pirate music. After that we can tax the French electric company for providing power to run those piracy machines.
Finally we can tax the French Government being complete idiots.
Moving right along, the French government is back-pedaling from its 2005 name ruling. It would see obvious now that having your last name hyphenated with two hyphens look ghastly. But I’m sure it made perfect sense to a French bureaucrat at the time!
According to the old ruling, a child with parents with last name, say, Gagnon and Sicard, would end up with a hyphenated last name with double hyphens – Gagnon–Sicard, in an attempt to distinguish it from someone with one parent’s already hyphenated name, Gagnon-Sicard.
As for the 175,000 French children born after the ruling in 2005?
Double-dashed offspring will then have the option of striking off a hyphen from their surname, or remaining grammatically incorrect for the rest of their lives.
Last but not least, and in another blatant hand gesture to the rest of the world that economic recovery is clearly not on the top of its domestic agenda, and there’s a surplus of police personnel waiting to be made useful, the French government wants you to be civil! More specifically, to be civil to your spouse, in your own house.
The proposed legislation would punish partners who ‘overstep the mark’ during verbal spats in the home. The law would apply to husbands and wives, as well as cohabiting couples. It is expected to cover every kind of slur from repeated rude remarks about a partner’s appearance, false allegations of infidelity and threats of physical violence.
Police are being urged to issue a caution in the first instance of a reported crime, but repeat offenders could face a fine, electronic tagging or jail.
Where would we be without France?